THE IDIOT IN TBILISI

The biggest headache for Western leaders over Georgia is trying to keep control of the vain, naïve idiot in Tbilisi, President Mikheil Saakashvili.

Single-handedly, this Harvard-educated hothead tried to start World War III with his assault on South Ossetia and was naïve enough to believe he could force NATO, which declined his application for membership in Bucharest in June, to support him - or at least get America to send in its big guns.

The official reason he got the brush off from NATO was Georgia’s instability. It now seems clear that at least some of its members must have had reservations about his instability.

As for America supporting him, does the man never read the papers or take a look at the news on television or the Internet? Even if it wanted to, the US hasn’t got the spare dollars to go barging into Georgia with guns blazing. It’s not only got its military hands full in Iraq and Afghanistan, but it’s up to its eyes in hoc in China and desperately spending every last Treasury penny propping up coast-to-coast mortgage companies Fanny May and Freddie Mac to fight off not just recession but a full scale 1930s style Depression.

What’s more, as ex-British Minister Tony Blair can vouch, the price of friendship with America is that they dictate the terms. Unless you need aid, all you’ll get back is a nice cup of tea at White House or, if you are really good and obedient, invited to a weekend at Camp David.

Once US Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice had wielded the big stick and forced Saakashvili to sign the cease fire agreement, he was probably taking sexist revenge when he started raving about the length of women’s skirts at their joint Press conference afterwards.

This week it was British Foreign Secretary David Milliband’s turn to look on while the idiot ranted about Hezbollah supporting Russia and the situation in Georgia being of ‘deep concern’ to China and India.

A hot line seeking to Hezbollah’s support hardly sounds like a Kremlin priority, right now China is cock-a-hoop topping the medals table at its own glorious Olympics and India has enough problems with Pakistan and Kashmir to have much time to worry about Georgia.

I don’t know what it’s costing his country to pay for the expensive spin doctors he’s hired to advise and assist with his global media coverage. But it’s a pity someone there hasn’t told him the point of getting your message on TV is to enhance your image - not ruin it as he does every time he opens his mouth.

One commentator has remarked that Russia is not bothered about PR and image. With the idiot in Tbilisi digging an ever bigger hole for himself with every word he utters, it doesn’t need to - his outbursts make Messrs Putin and Medvedev look like sane, reasonable men.

Russia says it has no interest in regime change in Georgia, which is hardly surprising as its troops have looted and wrecked the place with impunity anyway as well as extending their control over it.

It is the West which needs to watch out for Saakashvili. If letting off steam at Press conferences with leaders like Rice and Milliband no longer becomes enough to keep him under control, he might restart the war without telling them.

A REFRESHING CHANGE

When they return home from the Beijing Olympics, offers of sponsorship and multi million publishing deals await the new generation of sporting stars in Team GB.

What a refreshing change that for once we have a group of young people whose achievements have earned them fame and as much money as they can make - unlike the born loser Reality TV freaks who simply want to be rich and famous.

It’s also refreshing that Team GB is not being British - coming home with one silver medal and three bronze and saying it’s the taking part, not the winning, which counts.

But the team’s success has been too much for the Australians, who can’t handle being beaten in the medal table by Britain and have spent the week whingeing about it on the air waves.

THIS MAN SHOULD NOT SMILE

British Prime Minister Gordon Brown was not amused in Kabul when Afghan President Karzai joked about government members plotting. But he raised a smile when Chinese President Hu Jin Tao greeted him in Beijing.

Brown should not do smiling. His ghastly grin looked like a mask from a vampire fancy dress ball.

Copyright © Rebecca Hamilton 2008. All Rights Reserved